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The Whole Pink Thing


October is breast cancer awareness month. Unless you have been living under a rock, I’m sure you seen all the pink stuff promoting breast cancer. Everywhere you look you find pink stuff. Pink NFL apparel, pink Halloween pumpkins, pink grocery bags, pink hats, pink jewelry, pink signs, pink websites, pink purses, pink key chains, pink coffee mugs, pink umbrellas, pink packaging, pink pink pink pink everywhere. I think you get my drift.

Some survivors feel companies are exploiting breast cancer and just slapping a pink ribbon on everything in an effort to sell their products. I’ve read that the pink ribbon, as a symbol, tends to pretty up what is a pretty ugly disease. Some say the pink ribbon is easier to look at than the disease itself.

Cancer is a nasty, cruel, and deadly beast. It attacks our healthy cells, assaults our bones and blood, destroys our vital organs, and invades our brains. Cancer takes our hair, our loved ones, our body parts and our lives. It causes pain, despair, misery, sorrow, and death. Cancer is not a pretty picture by any means, pink ribbon or not.

Many people feel overwhelmed by the constant pink reminder of cancer. I know I’ve never really been a big fan of the whole pink thing. I remember when I first was diagnosed with breast cancer, I didn’t want anyone to know and I sure didn’t want to wear pink cancer stuff. I remember being given a free pink baseball cap at my cancer treatment center. I did not want to wear it. Maybe I was in denial but I didn’t want to publicize my cancer by wearing pink. Later as I came to grips with my cancer and accepted it, I did wear my pink baseball hat. I don’t know if I am making any sense but these are the many thoughts I have about the whole pink thing. Oh don’t misunderstand my feelings about cancer awareness. If all the pink ribbons will help some women to get their mammogram or do self-exams, I’m all for it. I only hope that companies aren’t looking to profit off all this pink stuff as that just isn’t what this is all suppose to be about.

So please during this month of breast cancer awareness, do focus on the important message in all this. We all want to kick cancer out of our lives and the lives of others permanently. I pray for all those fighting this terrible foe, may you have healing and peace as you move along your journey. But ultimately I hope and pray a cure can be found once and for all!

Reason to Smile

I have great news and a reason to smile. I just completed another round of scans and an ultrasound. I am NED! If you aren’t familiar with the term NED, it means No Evidence of Disease when referring to someone who has had cancer. I am happy to report all my scans and tests are clear. It’s as one doctor said to me today, it’s all good — be assured there is no sign of cancer.

It’s been since March 2008, that I have been battling breast cancer. Once you’ve had cancer, you tend to think about it’s return. You try and not worry about a recurrence. At first it’s about all one can do but not think about it’s return. But as time goes on it does get better. The reassurances that it has not returned is empowering. Things haven’t always been easy and I still have a few aches and pains from surgery and radiation. But overall I am feeling pretty good and have basically gotten my life and activities back to normal now. So I smile and say that I love NED. I hope and pray I stay that way forever. Until the next scans and follow-ups, I am reminding myself to enjoy life today and to be happy I am beating cancer each and every precious day.

A Pink Year-End Update

Well it has been quite a year for anyone who has been following this blog and my cancer journey this year. I figured I’d do a year-end update just to close out the year. First and far most, I am doing well. My recent scans show nothing of concern and I’m feeling pretty good. While my hair is very very short, it has grown back and I can go without the hats and scarves now. I survived surgery in April, chemo this summer, and radiation this fall. I have cut, poisoned, fried, and burned this cancer. Hopefully, God willing, I have permanently kicked it out the door and out of my body. I never want it to return and I pray daily that this can be the end of breast cancer or any cancer in my life.

In closing, I want to say thank you to everyone who has emailed, commented, prayed, written, called, or otherwise supported me through this pink journey. It hasn’t been easy. Cancer never is. But there is always hope and things can get better. I am proof positive of this.

So thanks again all my friends and family, I love you all. Enjoy life to its fullest and have a very happy New Year!

My Journey Update

It’s been a while since I’ve posted about my pink journey here so I figured I’d do an update. I am one month out now from the completion of radiation treatments. My skin is healing nicely and I don’t have any real issues with my skin now other than being dark on my shoulder in the radiation field. I also have been dealing with my muscles tightening up in my arm and hand on the radiation side. I continue to do stretching exercises to try and relieve that situation.

I started taking Tamoxifen today which I’m a bit concerned about this drug therapy but I know it is necessary as my cancer tumor was estrogen positive and I have to make sure I don’t feed my cancer. I am concerned about all the side effects with Tamoxifen but I am reminded that this whole thing is out of my hands. I need to leave it all in the healing hands of our Lord.

So overall I’m doing pretty good and just wanted to let everyone know how I am doing. My hair is growing back but at a very sloooow rate. My hair has always been fine so all this chemo hasn’t been good for my hair. But it is growing and I hope by Christmas to have a little “do” that I can display so I don’t have to continue the knit hat and ball cap routine.

More later, until then thank you everyone for all your wonderful warm thoughts and prayers.
Cindy

My Fire

I post a picture of fire to represent how my radiation feels today. It’s like a fire under my arm and especially under my armpit. I have one more full breast radiation treatment on Monday and then I have my boost. The boost is just radiation to my tumor bed so my armpit will get a break — Yahoo. I need this break so much and will be very happy to be done with my radiation a week from Monday. Until then, please be patient with me as I haven’t been able to do much crocheting lately and haven’t had any new recycled patterns to share with you this week.

Rest assured, God willing, I will be back soon and in full health to post more free patterns very soon.